A question has started evolving and mutating inside my skull. It has formed wings and is buzzing around my head like an angry bee caged in a small jar. The question: what matters?
In this life full of beauty and charm and corruption and death, what is it that truly matters? Is it the big house or the sexy car? Is it the girlfriend who dumped you or the family that supports you? Is it the friends who would die for you or the friends who would back bite? Is it the good grades you need or the hot girls you want? The list is long and never ending. We want so many things but what is it we actually need? What truly matters? I wanted everything I just mentioned. I wanted money, fame, respect, girls, comfort and power. But now I want what I actually need and what actually matters. I already had money, fame, respect, girls and power. I had everything I wanted or at least a bit of everything. Now, after everything was taken away from me, I realized these things are temporary. They are like that spring breeze which caress your hair and slide over you skin giving you feelings of euphoria but eventually thrusts you into the burning heat of the summers. Everything must end one day; "life" being the certain of all.
The question remains: what matters? I may have an idea, but my quest has just begun. I may end up more lost than before or I may end up disappearing off the face of the Earth but my quest will only reach it's destination when I have found a satisfactory answer. Is it God? Or is it spiritual comfort? If it's either of these, then how can I find them? Is it love for humanity or is it the life Hereafter? If it's either of these, then how should I act about?
What matters?
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
No Comments
Learn to say "No comments." I swear it is the best phrase in the whole realm of English language. From awkward situations to sensitive remarks, it will save you and help you avoid the muddy pond of all that is bad.
No Comments FTW.
No Comments FTW.
Heaven's Garden
From behind the glazed glass, I could see heaven.
It all started with a breeze: a light caressing breeze that tickled all the plants and trees in the garden outside the window. Slowly and gradually the breeze turned into a chilly wind and enveloped everything green in the garden. The branches shivered and the leaves fluttered like green butterflies. The garden reflected all hues of green and gold and projected the shim shim shim sound of the dancing plants and waving grass.
Then nature added another sound to it's music. The tip tip tip of the rain and then the drum of a thunder. The drops slowly slid down the leaves as if whispering a quick message from the sky to the leaves. The colds parted a little to let some sunlight through which turned every wet green leaf into a golden flake.
Beauty was at it's zenith! Heaven had descended upon Earth. I was home.
It all started with a breeze: a light caressing breeze that tickled all the plants and trees in the garden outside the window. Slowly and gradually the breeze turned into a chilly wind and enveloped everything green in the garden. The branches shivered and the leaves fluttered like green butterflies. The garden reflected all hues of green and gold and projected the shim shim shim sound of the dancing plants and waving grass.
Then nature added another sound to it's music. The tip tip tip of the rain and then the drum of a thunder. The drops slowly slid down the leaves as if whispering a quick message from the sky to the leaves. The colds parted a little to let some sunlight through which turned every wet green leaf into a golden flake.
Beauty was at it's zenith! Heaven had descended upon Earth. I was home.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
My Familia
My family feeds me strength. And courage. And hope. And knowledge. And happiness. And all the good things in life.
No matter how down I am and no matter how high I am, my family will always stand behind me and whisper in my ear: Shehroz, this too shall pass.
After my trust was broken by someone extremely close, I know I will never be able to trust ANYONE except my own family.
No matter how down I am and no matter how high I am, my family will always stand behind me and whisper in my ear: Shehroz, this too shall pass.
After my trust was broken by someone extremely close, I know I will never be able to trust ANYONE except my own family.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Give...
Kahlil Gibran showed me a new world through his work The Prophet.
"You often say, 'I would give, but only to the deserving.'
The trees in your orchard say not so, nor the flocks in your pasture.
They give that they may live, for to withhold is to perish."
(Kahlil Gibran)
When you eat, remember that you do not rightfully own the fruit nor it's nutrients. All that belongs to nature and nature has generously lent it to you so that you could use those nutrients to give back to humanity and nature. You have but only borrowed that fruit's essence; it is now YOUR responsibility to fairly use it to return that essence back to the nature.
Be grateful that nature chose you as it's vessel when you eat that piece of bread, and then ponder over why you have been chosen: Why must You live and a child in a village die? The piece of bread could have become food for any of the infinite beings on this planet, but why out of all the creatures you have been nominated?
The answers to such questions are plain and simple. We MUST either give back or give forth to carry on the legacy. Eat and then give freely. Do not be selective and do not say: I will only give to the poor or the old. Have you ever heard that a tree did not give you it's fruit because of your age, caste or religion?
If nature is not differentiating between a Hindi and a Muslim or a Black and a White, then why must we act god and decide on our own? We are not gods and we must do what nature expects us to do. Nature wants us to be like nature. Nature wants us to give and let give, live and let live.
"You often say, 'I would give, but only to the deserving.'
The trees in your orchard say not so, nor the flocks in your pasture.
They give that they may live, for to withhold is to perish."
(Kahlil Gibran)
When you eat, remember that you do not rightfully own the fruit nor it's nutrients. All that belongs to nature and nature has generously lent it to you so that you could use those nutrients to give back to humanity and nature. You have but only borrowed that fruit's essence; it is now YOUR responsibility to fairly use it to return that essence back to the nature.
Be grateful that nature chose you as it's vessel when you eat that piece of bread, and then ponder over why you have been chosen: Why must You live and a child in a village die? The piece of bread could have become food for any of the infinite beings on this planet, but why out of all the creatures you have been nominated?
The answers to such questions are plain and simple. We MUST either give back or give forth to carry on the legacy. Eat and then give freely. Do not be selective and do not say: I will only give to the poor or the old. Have you ever heard that a tree did not give you it's fruit because of your age, caste or religion?
If nature is not differentiating between a Hindi and a Muslim or a Black and a White, then why must we act god and decide on our own? We are not gods and we must do what nature expects us to do. Nature wants us to be like nature. Nature wants us to give and let give, live and let live.
Saturday, January 7, 2012
We. Are. Slaves.
Long ago, Quaid-Azam Muhammad Ali Jinnah dreamt of a Pakistan where the Muslims would be free. Muslims of the Subcontinent were slaves of a foreign power; they were slaves of an alien law and they were slaves of a different religion. These Muslims were discriminated, oppressed and persecuted. Quaid-e-Azam wanted a free Pakistan for free Muslims. It will not be wrong to say that today’s Pakistan is exactly the opposite of the vision of our founding father, who dreamed of a liberal, progressive Islamic state based on the principles of justice.
The question we should all ask ourselves is: where do we stand now? Is this the Pakistan our great leader wanted? ARE WE FREE? Unfortunately, the answer is NO. We are still slaves; slaves of of foreign TV channels, slaves of western culture and clothing, slaves of a so-called "modern" lifestyle, slaves of our own selfishness. Now the world has become a global village and we are still discriminated, oppressed and persecuted on a global scale. Even now innocent people are dying just like during the days of Independence. There were extremists then and there are extremists now. The streets were red with blood then and the streets are painted with blood every day even now. Are we really free?Our soldiers die every day and instead of supporting them we criticize and insult them. People are falling deep into the pit of poverty and misery while WE sit and enjoy our luxurious lives. All these table-talks and long evening walks won't help us at all!
Our Quaid weaved Pakistan with the threads of Unity, Faith and Discipline. He visioned us all following these three 'extremely important' principles. Are we following them? We are not at all United. The provinces are divided and fighting amonst themselves. More provinces are being demanded further dividing Pakistan like pieces of a puzzle. Navy, Army and Airforce have issues with each other while our government departments are not at all cooperating with each other. We have lost faith in our country, in our potential, in our resources and in our selves. Many of us are even losing faith in our perfect religion. We can reign over the world if we believe in ourselves and in the soil of this beautiful country. We can rise and become the best if we just have some faith in our color GREEN. Discipline is only taught in primary schools and we easily forget all about it when we enter the practical Pakistani life. Starting from something as small as throwing garbage on the ground to something as big as not following the constitution, we are quite indisciplined. Constitution is our code of discipline but the legislation, judiciary, army, media and masses play around with it like some cheap china-made toy.
Dear countrymen, there is still hope if we wake up now. Before our Independence Muhammad Ali Jinnah saw a people full of deep, hidden potential. He saw them tarnished with struggle and pain yet they were still headstrong and ambitious. He saw their zeal, zest and hunger for freedom and success. And then he crafted Pakistan for them. Dear countrymen, the blood of those strong people still run in our veins. It is because of this blood we have still survived and InshAllah we will win our Freedom--AGAIN.
.
The question we should all ask ourselves is: where do we stand now? Is this the Pakistan our great leader wanted? ARE WE FREE? Unfortunately, the answer is NO. We are still slaves; slaves of of foreign TV channels, slaves of western culture and clothing, slaves of a so-called "modern" lifestyle, slaves of our own selfishness. Now the world has become a global village and we are still discriminated, oppressed and persecuted on a global scale. Even now innocent people are dying just like during the days of Independence. There were extremists then and there are extremists now. The streets were red with blood then and the streets are painted with blood every day even now. Are we really free?Our soldiers die every day and instead of supporting them we criticize and insult them. People are falling deep into the pit of poverty and misery while WE sit and enjoy our luxurious lives. All these table-talks and long evening walks won't help us at all!
Our Quaid weaved Pakistan with the threads of Unity, Faith and Discipline. He visioned us all following these three 'extremely important' principles. Are we following them? We are not at all United. The provinces are divided and fighting amonst themselves. More provinces are being demanded further dividing Pakistan like pieces of a puzzle. Navy, Army and Airforce have issues with each other while our government departments are not at all cooperating with each other. We have lost faith in our country, in our potential, in our resources and in our selves. Many of us are even losing faith in our perfect religion. We can reign over the world if we believe in ourselves and in the soil of this beautiful country. We can rise and become the best if we just have some faith in our color GREEN. Discipline is only taught in primary schools and we easily forget all about it when we enter the practical Pakistani life. Starting from something as small as throwing garbage on the ground to something as big as not following the constitution, we are quite indisciplined. Constitution is our code of discipline but the legislation, judiciary, army, media and masses play around with it like some cheap china-made toy.
Dear countrymen, there is still hope if we wake up now. Before our Independence Muhammad Ali Jinnah saw a people full of deep, hidden potential. He saw them tarnished with struggle and pain yet they were still headstrong and ambitious. He saw their zeal, zest and hunger for freedom and success. And then he crafted Pakistan for them. Dear countrymen, the blood of those strong people still run in our veins. It is because of this blood we have still survived and InshAllah we will win our Freedom--AGAIN.
.
Friday, January 6, 2012
A Random Realization...
In my race to success, I did not realize that I had become very selfish. Thank God it isn't too late. 2012 will definitely be a personality changing year.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Thoughts of a Sun
The mighty God, with a thought, made me proud and bright;
I was, in the whole universe, a vibrant, a magnificent sight.
Every thing in the skies, with eyes weak, lowered their gaze;
My radiance was bold and wild, with beauty I was all ablaze.
With clay, then my Lord, fashioned mankind so small and weak;
The Angels cried, this man flawed, on Earth will havoc wreak.
The whole creation had to bow down to this being so imperfect;
My God said, "don't be a Satan and your warmth do not reject!"
For the love of my Creator, I bowed down to a being unworthy;
For this mankind so imperfect, even I had to dim my envied glory,
For it was God's command to help this ungrateful bag of flesh
Without prejudice and pride I must provide daylight and food fresh.
Oh mankind mortal, what is wrong and why don't you understand,
You were just born and today you wrought destruction so grand.
You kill and let kill; you sleep and let die; you laugh and let cry.
I ask you oh flesh, are you so flawed and insensate? I ask, "Why?"
I am the mighty Sun, without which you are nothing and no one;
Even after your atrocities, I am to provide; God's will be done.
If I had free will and power, I would have turned you all to dust.
Because you are a shame and you let the given Principles rust.
I was, in the whole universe, a vibrant, a magnificent sight.
Every thing in the skies, with eyes weak, lowered their gaze;
My radiance was bold and wild, with beauty I was all ablaze.
With clay, then my Lord, fashioned mankind so small and weak;
The Angels cried, this man flawed, on Earth will havoc wreak.
The whole creation had to bow down to this being so imperfect;
My God said, "don't be a Satan and your warmth do not reject!"
For the love of my Creator, I bowed down to a being unworthy;
For this mankind so imperfect, even I had to dim my envied glory,
For it was God's command to help this ungrateful bag of flesh
Without prejudice and pride I must provide daylight and food fresh.
Oh mankind mortal, what is wrong and why don't you understand,
You were just born and today you wrought destruction so grand.
You kill and let kill; you sleep and let die; you laugh and let cry.
I ask you oh flesh, are you so flawed and insensate? I ask, "Why?"
I am the mighty Sun, without which you are nothing and no one;
Even after your atrocities, I am to provide; God's will be done.
If I had free will and power, I would have turned you all to dust.
Because you are a shame and you let the given Principles rust.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
A Letter to "Pakistanis"
Dear Pakistanis,
How are you? I hope you are doing great in your homes in front of your television sets. I have often heard you all criticizing the status quo of Pakistan and it's "citizens." Yes, the word "citizen" is put in quotation marks because I am being sarcastic-very sarcastic. Are you really a Pakistani citizen? For me you are nothing but citizens of your own homes and comfortable lives. As for your criticism, to me its nothing more than an immobile child crying for milk; all the baby can do is just scream and cry. Have you ever thought about getting out of your own cocoon?
How are your schools, colleges and offices going? I am sure you must be enjoying high quality education. Or lunch breaks. And parties. And good food. Not to mention the comfortable rides you get to your destination in your own warm cars and jeeps. Or even taxis.
I am doing okay here. I ride the bus every morning with my hands numb and my feet stiff. Its very cold you know. But I do not know where am I going. Sometimes I go to the roof-less school and sometimes I just go to the market for work. It just depends how much food we need at my home. Oh don't worry about me, I am surviving. Or maybe you never worried about me since you are already busy in your own close-to-perfect lives. You don't care if I survive or not. You just care that you are popular in your city or your neighborhood.
Dear countrymen, the problem with you all is that you enjoy your lives and get good education. You squeeze from Pakistan but you never give back. A few remarks about politicians here and a small donation there is utterly useless. A few small school community service projects and visits to orphanages is nothing but a mockery towards Pakistan and those orphans. We don't need a one-day sympathy visit or week long lessons on English. All we need is that you be a citizen of Pakistan and fulfill your own responsibilities. Have you ever thought how much tax your father gives? Have you ever considered what impact an extra light bulb in your room would have on the poor neighborhood outside your city? Have you ever thought how much money you spend in a single visit to Hardees or a Halloween party? I run my whole house with that amount of money. Sometimes with even half of it.
I have been hearing the word "revolution" and "change" a lot these days. Some new politician gives you hope and you go crazy after him. I don't care. For me they are all the same. For me YOU are all the same. Useless. Selfish. Ignorant. Idiots. Just talking about revolution and visiting a single 'jalsa' is not going to bring any sort of change. YOU have to change YOUR OWN SELF before a change in Pakistan. Otherwise, this so-called change will be short-lived just like it was temporary in the history of Pakistan. You have to realize that to truly help Pakistan you must gaze inside your own flesh and see the mountain of flaws that lie in there. Putting pictures of a politician on your Facebook or talking about politics on your Status is nothing but an example of your personal laziness and incompetency.
I wish I could love you all but I hate you all for being so apathetic. I love Pakistan but I despise the people in it. Hear me and save your self. Pakistan right now is no different than the Age of Ignorance of pre-Islamic Arab. You are going down the path of destruction but I know you have enough money and resources to simply move to another country whereas I will die on these streets for YOUR mistakes, arrogance and ignorance. But remember, one day may come when your blood will be shed in other countries. You are a Pakistani and Pakistan should be your final burial ground. Don't run away. A Pakistani can never be a coward.
With love,
A poor citizen of Pakistan,
Waiting for you,
To do what you have to do.
How are you? I hope you are doing great in your homes in front of your television sets. I have often heard you all criticizing the status quo of Pakistan and it's "citizens." Yes, the word "citizen" is put in quotation marks because I am being sarcastic-very sarcastic. Are you really a Pakistani citizen? For me you are nothing but citizens of your own homes and comfortable lives. As for your criticism, to me its nothing more than an immobile child crying for milk; all the baby can do is just scream and cry. Have you ever thought about getting out of your own cocoon?
How are your schools, colleges and offices going? I am sure you must be enjoying high quality education. Or lunch breaks. And parties. And good food. Not to mention the comfortable rides you get to your destination in your own warm cars and jeeps. Or even taxis.
I am doing okay here. I ride the bus every morning with my hands numb and my feet stiff. Its very cold you know. But I do not know where am I going. Sometimes I go to the roof-less school and sometimes I just go to the market for work. It just depends how much food we need at my home. Oh don't worry about me, I am surviving. Or maybe you never worried about me since you are already busy in your own close-to-perfect lives. You don't care if I survive or not. You just care that you are popular in your city or your neighborhood.
Dear countrymen, the problem with you all is that you enjoy your lives and get good education. You squeeze from Pakistan but you never give back. A few remarks about politicians here and a small donation there is utterly useless. A few small school community service projects and visits to orphanages is nothing but a mockery towards Pakistan and those orphans. We don't need a one-day sympathy visit or week long lessons on English. All we need is that you be a citizen of Pakistan and fulfill your own responsibilities. Have you ever thought how much tax your father gives? Have you ever considered what impact an extra light bulb in your room would have on the poor neighborhood outside your city? Have you ever thought how much money you spend in a single visit to Hardees or a Halloween party? I run my whole house with that amount of money. Sometimes with even half of it.
I have been hearing the word "revolution" and "change" a lot these days. Some new politician gives you hope and you go crazy after him. I don't care. For me they are all the same. For me YOU are all the same. Useless. Selfish. Ignorant. Idiots. Just talking about revolution and visiting a single 'jalsa' is not going to bring any sort of change. YOU have to change YOUR OWN SELF before a change in Pakistan. Otherwise, this so-called change will be short-lived just like it was temporary in the history of Pakistan. You have to realize that to truly help Pakistan you must gaze inside your own flesh and see the mountain of flaws that lie in there. Putting pictures of a politician on your Facebook or talking about politics on your Status is nothing but an example of your personal laziness and incompetency.
I wish I could love you all but I hate you all for being so apathetic. I love Pakistan but I despise the people in it. Hear me and save your self. Pakistan right now is no different than the Age of Ignorance of pre-Islamic Arab. You are going down the path of destruction but I know you have enough money and resources to simply move to another country whereas I will die on these streets for YOUR mistakes, arrogance and ignorance. But remember, one day may come when your blood will be shed in other countries. You are a Pakistani and Pakistan should be your final burial ground. Don't run away. A Pakistani can never be a coward.
With love,
A poor citizen of Pakistan,
Waiting for you,
To do what you have to do.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Fall of 2011...
Where was I exactly a year ago?
High above in the sky...
Where am I right now?
Deep below in the pit of despair...
The year 2011 proved to be the worst year of my life. This year gave me a lot but also took away all that it gave me. This year I fell in love. This year I was given fame and influence. This year gave me happiness. But this same year snatched it all away and I spent my new year alone with no one to call or text. I love my family who is my only support now. Yes, this new year only a handful of people wished me unlike last year when every single person in my contact list called or texted me or invited me to parties. Dear 2011, why were you so mean to me? Oh dear 2011, why did you give me everything just to take it all away? My dear 2011, WHY ME?
I was all set to start my adventure into the unknown world of practical life in an alien land; I never knew I would never make it. I was all set to turn my love into a long lasting affair; I never knew I would be thrown away in the trash. I was all set to embark on my own pilgrimage to explore the world; I never knew my legs would be cut off right before my journey. 2011, I will never forgive you for all that. Why did you raise me up to the sky and then thrown me back? Did you take me all the way up just to make the fall more painful?
But something whispered in my ear. The year 2011 bowed down on it's feet and explained WHY it had done all that. Dear Shehroz, it said, I did all that to teach you. Only to teach you. Dear Shehroz, it won't be long before I am gone but the time ahead will never be easy. The time ahead will treat you harshly and throw you around but what you learnt in 2011 will save you. It will save you from the pain and frustration up ahead. I saved you from your own destruction by destroying you and re-making you. I am sorry Shehroz but somethings are better taught the hard way. Forgive me but DO NOT FORGET ME.
Now, I turn to 2012 with optimism and hope. I pray it lifts me back up in the sky and restores me to my former glory. The fall in 2011 will be a life-lesson for my whole future. What I learnt in that year shaped a stronger and better Shehroz. I am no more vulnerable and I am no more weak. Thank you 2011 but I am glad you are gone. Dear 2012, HERE I COME...
High above in the sky...
Where am I right now?
Deep below in the pit of despair...
The year 2011 proved to be the worst year of my life. This year gave me a lot but also took away all that it gave me. This year I fell in love. This year I was given fame and influence. This year gave me happiness. But this same year snatched it all away and I spent my new year alone with no one to call or text. I love my family who is my only support now. Yes, this new year only a handful of people wished me unlike last year when every single person in my contact list called or texted me or invited me to parties. Dear 2011, why were you so mean to me? Oh dear 2011, why did you give me everything just to take it all away? My dear 2011, WHY ME?
I was all set to start my adventure into the unknown world of practical life in an alien land; I never knew I would never make it. I was all set to turn my love into a long lasting affair; I never knew I would be thrown away in the trash. I was all set to embark on my own pilgrimage to explore the world; I never knew my legs would be cut off right before my journey. 2011, I will never forgive you for all that. Why did you raise me up to the sky and then thrown me back? Did you take me all the way up just to make the fall more painful?
But something whispered in my ear. The year 2011 bowed down on it's feet and explained WHY it had done all that. Dear Shehroz, it said, I did all that to teach you. Only to teach you. Dear Shehroz, it won't be long before I am gone but the time ahead will never be easy. The time ahead will treat you harshly and throw you around but what you learnt in 2011 will save you. It will save you from the pain and frustration up ahead. I saved you from your own destruction by destroying you and re-making you. I am sorry Shehroz but somethings are better taught the hard way. Forgive me but DO NOT FORGET ME.
Now, I turn to 2012 with optimism and hope. I pray it lifts me back up in the sky and restores me to my former glory. The fall in 2011 will be a life-lesson for my whole future. What I learnt in that year shaped a stronger and better Shehroz. I am no more vulnerable and I am no more weak. Thank you 2011 but I am glad you are gone. Dear 2012, HERE I COME...
Thursday, December 22, 2011
The Crumbling Empire...
A man who once commanded a whole ship with a crew in hundreds, now lay all alone on a hospital bed. The man who was proud and independent, now had to depend on others to help him sit up. A man with a mountain of knowledge, now didn't even know that he had been spending nights in a hospital. A man with the farsightedness of a telescope, now had an eye that didn't function at all. Life can be very unfair at times. Daddy is alive but his essence has declined. He is weak and he is not the same anymore.
Every Mighty Empire has experienced a downfall. For many, the crumbling away of an empire is nothing short of a story that moistens their eyes. But daddy's final decline made me sob and scream. I had to cry all alone. I had to hide and cage my emotions while everyone is busy taking care of daddy. I had to help them too, but my hands and feet are paralyzed. I refuse to believe that he is just a mortal. I refuse to see him in this condition. I simply refuse.
But I need to cry, I need to scream, I need to hit my head on a wall. I need daddy. I need him to get out of his bed and walk me around the house. I need him to do his magic again and squeeze out a whole bar of chocolate from my ears. I need him to sit with me on the lunch table and repeat all his stories and adventures. I need him to stand proud and hug me when I succeed in life. I need him to attend my future high achiever's ceremony. I need him to approve a girl for me after telling me all the stories about his girlfriends. I need him to sit with me and watch baywatch with me again.
But more than anything, I need him to live forever.
Even now as I write this, I get up to wipe my tears and daddy speaks in his half sleepy condition, "Shehroz, Sardi toh nahi lag rahi?"
(Shehroz, are you cold?)
Every Mighty Empire has experienced a downfall. For many, the crumbling away of an empire is nothing short of a story that moistens their eyes. But daddy's final decline made me sob and scream. I had to cry all alone. I had to hide and cage my emotions while everyone is busy taking care of daddy. I had to help them too, but my hands and feet are paralyzed. I refuse to believe that he is just a mortal. I refuse to see him in this condition. I simply refuse.
But I need to cry, I need to scream, I need to hit my head on a wall. I need daddy. I need him to get out of his bed and walk me around the house. I need him to do his magic again and squeeze out a whole bar of chocolate from my ears. I need him to sit with me on the lunch table and repeat all his stories and adventures. I need him to stand proud and hug me when I succeed in life. I need him to attend my future high achiever's ceremony. I need him to approve a girl for me after telling me all the stories about his girlfriends. I need him to sit with me and watch baywatch with me again.
But more than anything, I need him to live forever.
Even now as I write this, I get up to wipe my tears and daddy speaks in his half sleepy condition, "Shehroz, Sardi toh nahi lag rahi?"
(Shehroz, are you cold?)
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Areesha be the awesomest...
Areesha of Me, Myself and I wrote this for my new blog:
"Most of you might know Oz from Oz and Life... but I bet you guys haven't been following his new blog: I am Grateful for.... How do I know that? Simple, HE HAD TWO FOLLOWERS! People, follow his blog! Bas end of story, no questions asked!
Oz, I'm surrounded by people who're depressed all the time, and yes I'm included in that list. When I read your posts, I feel grateful. Thank you for making such an awesome blog. Yes, I am giving you all these awards because they're true."
And then she gave me the following 11 awards here:
In response to all this I have the following to say:
I have been blogging for quite some time now. And and and never been awarded like this. Thank You soooooo much Areesha for this. It actually encourages me to keep writing more and more because at one point when there were NO followers I decided to just stop posting :-p
But then people started trickling down into the blog. And I'm so glad to have come across your blog and get a peek into your life. I am honored :-) and you are AWESOME.
This is so awesome, and I have never been more pumped up about blogging than before. More stuff coming up. I apologize for this long inactivity.
And best of luck Areesha :-)
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
A Deceiving Smile
(I apologize for my very long absence. I was/am very busy in some important life changing factors. Wish me luck.)
Yesterday, I attended a wedding. I saw many people smiling. A smile-such a beautiful phenomenon.
However, this "smile" is a very powerful thing.
A smile can hide many sorrows. A smile can hide many tensions and depressions. A smile can hide hatred and jealousy.
Above all, a smile can hide HYPOCRISY.
A wedding full of smiles. A wedding full of hypocrites. Amazing.
Yesterday, I attended a wedding. I saw many people smiling. A smile-such a beautiful phenomenon.
However, this "smile" is a very powerful thing.
A smile can hide many sorrows. A smile can hide many tensions and depressions. A smile can hide hatred and jealousy.
Above all, a smile can hide HYPOCRISY.
A wedding full of smiles. A wedding full of hypocrites. Amazing.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Awesome Gadgets
I have started organizing my life. Thanks to some very important life lessons I learnt from my own failure.
I love an application in my iPad-2 that helps me organize every important thing in my life. To-Dos and tasks as well as scheduling. Thank you Apple and Steve Jobs for this amazing piece of technology that is extremely addictive.
P.S: I am not showing-off so don't jayluss :-p
I love an application in my iPad-2 that helps me organize every important thing in my life. To-Dos and tasks as well as scheduling. Thank you Apple and Steve Jobs for this amazing piece of technology that is extremely addictive.
P.S: I am not showing-off so don't jayluss :-p
Friday, September 23, 2011
An Advice to All...
A word of advise to my friends (Yes, You all are my friends).
Do not make long term goals without any achievable milestones in between. Either make short term goals or make one long term goal with several milestones in between. These milestone should divide hour journey into very small pieces and become like your short term goals.
I am saying this out of experience. I have noticed that to succeed we must be able to see our goal in front of us. The sight of the goal will keep us motivated and charged up even if we fall. On the other hand, if our long term goal is so far away that we cannot see it, then it won't take long before we lose touch with it. We will eventually lose contact, lose hope and give up. Furthermore, if we fall, it would become extremely hard and painful to get back up. Another useful thing about having milestones or short term goals is that if in case we cannot achieve that goal due to any number of unfortunate reasons, we will have enough room for change. We will only need to reroute, recalculate and make small changes to get back on track towards success.
Cheers. Wish you a successful life.
Do not make long term goals without any achievable milestones in between. Either make short term goals or make one long term goal with several milestones in between. These milestone should divide hour journey into very small pieces and become like your short term goals.
I am saying this out of experience. I have noticed that to succeed we must be able to see our goal in front of us. The sight of the goal will keep us motivated and charged up even if we fall. On the other hand, if our long term goal is so far away that we cannot see it, then it won't take long before we lose touch with it. We will eventually lose contact, lose hope and give up. Furthermore, if we fall, it would become extremely hard and painful to get back up. Another useful thing about having milestones or short term goals is that if in case we cannot achieve that goal due to any number of unfortunate reasons, we will have enough room for change. We will only need to reroute, recalculate and make small changes to get back on track towards success.
Cheers. Wish you a successful life.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
My Eye Hurts :-/
Got beaten up pretty bad. Bruised my left eye as well got a blood clot inside the same eye. The typical cartoon-type bruise on the eye (purple eye) when someone gets punched. It feels as if someone drove a nail inside my head and keeps moving it back and forth. I have a few other bruises on my head and body but none as bad as the eye.
This happened around 3:20 pm yesterday near Roots when I was helping some friends move from one hostel to another. End story is that I punished those who hurt me in my own ingenious way. They will never forget the punishment they received for hurting me. I won't give out the details because I'm tired of repeating the same story again and again. It is the afterthoughts that I want to share.
I saw how people can be so heartless in their worldly affairs. I saw the extent to which they could be selfish. I also saw the lack of intelligence in many people. I further saw the extreme case of paranoia some people go through. This world is full of pathetic, imhumane idiots who deserve to be called nothing above Animals. The reason why Pakistan or even this world suffers is because of the type of humans I mentioned above. This world needs a global reform. More crucial than that; Pakistan needs a complete revolution as well as an evolution.
This post may not make sense to you but I'm in too much pain to think straight.
Oh, and by the way, I look really cool with this injury. Kinda Sexy. Sometimes I look like a flesh-hungry Zombie and sometimes I look like one of those Hollywood Werewolves about to transform into a blood-thirsty monster. HAWT ;-) :-p
Bye fellas. One last thing: Should get I an Eye-Patch and look Cooler?
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Changing Beliefs...
I have always been more of a you-make-your-own-destiny kinda guy. I did believe in Fate to an extent but I believed we had more control over our lives. I always thought that we make our own future. I always thought we were not governed by a pre-decreed law but reaped what we sowed. The stronger my belief in all this was the more I was contradicted by the story of my own life.
Now, I am having some major changes in my belief system.
Now, I am having some major changes in my belief system.
Saturday, September 17, 2011
An Alien in an Alien Land
Something unusual happened last month. It affected me to my core.
I was in Islamabad for the weekend and went to spend the night with a relative who is in the army. Some suspicious activity at the base alerted the whole security team and my relative had to go to deal with it. After a while he called me to help him out in interpreting a suspect they caught around the base who could speak no other language but Persian. I know basic Persian and I was ready to help but I did not know what lay just few minutes ahead of me.
The guy they caught wore a torn shalwar kameez. His shalwar (trouser) was completely torn and his kameez (shirt) was torn off from certain places. He was around 35 or 40 years old and had a light skin. This bearded person had medium height and had the features of a Tajik/Uzbek of the former USSR with small eyes, hard facial construction and strong built. It took 6 army officers to hold him down while I asked him questions.
Every time he answered my basic questions in Persian, and I would convey it to the officers, the soldiers would beat him. Whatever he said was considered a lie because his answers were quite insane. How can a guy from a separate part of the world end up in front of an army base in the middle of Pakistan? Something was wrong. He had NO money and NO ID. He could not speak Urdu or any other language spoken in Pakistan (except for Persian and very basic Pushto) and he was here. The part that disturbed ME the most was when he was being beaten. His cries and his screams were killing me. But I knew it was necessary. He was avoiding many of my questions but after some strong beating he started giving me good, but still vague, answers.
Beating was a necessity in such a situation. Being a person who fails to express his emotions many times, I could not control my emotions and decided to make up answers of my own to help this alien get out of misery. But, I could not do that. It was a matter of security and I must realize my responsibility of working for the greater good. I just did what the officers told me to. At such a point in life, one must remain as objective as possible while caging those soft emotions for the moment.
Then later, as I pondered over the whole situation, it did depress me. If you look at it this way, the guy was from a remote area of the world with nothing even close to the words "technology" or "modern -life." These people can be easily fooled or easily impressed by something as simple as a Pen. They only live on whatever the earth offers in their area. They eat simple and dress simple. They sometimes have never even seen a television set or a car. Read books by Greg Mortensen to get an idea how it is like in such parts of the world. They are physically strong because they eat pure food and do manual labor. After keeping all this in mind, put yourself in his shoes. Imagine being in a land with uniformed guards with guns and not being able to understand them. Then imagine being beaten up. You have no money and no documents. You don't even have relatives and you think that these people with guns may kill you.
The end result was that the guy was found to be a victim of fraud. Someone had promised him job and money in Pakistan and smuggled him here through mountains. He was fooled and his money was taken. Humans are pathetic. Worse than animals. The reason why he was not telling me the truth was that he feared we may kill him as he had broken many laws to come to Pakistan. Of course we would never kill someone just like that. I had to assure him he would not be shot dead and must cooperate to ensure his safe return to his own country. He did cooperate at last and was sent back after verification.
We are so insignificant. And there are so many inhuman acts happening all around the world. Dear friends, please step out of your air-conditioned lives and see the atrocities of the world. Learn from it. Condemn it. Wake up and fight those who may call themselves humans but are worse than animals. And friends, realize the fact that we are very insignificant but our actions may have a huge impact on this world. You are insignificant but you are powerful. Rise up.
Peace.
I was in Islamabad for the weekend and went to spend the night with a relative who is in the army. Some suspicious activity at the base alerted the whole security team and my relative had to go to deal with it. After a while he called me to help him out in interpreting a suspect they caught around the base who could speak no other language but Persian. I know basic Persian and I was ready to help but I did not know what lay just few minutes ahead of me.
The guy they caught wore a torn shalwar kameez. His shalwar (trouser) was completely torn and his kameez (shirt) was torn off from certain places. He was around 35 or 40 years old and had a light skin. This bearded person had medium height and had the features of a Tajik/Uzbek of the former USSR with small eyes, hard facial construction and strong built. It took 6 army officers to hold him down while I asked him questions.
Every time he answered my basic questions in Persian, and I would convey it to the officers, the soldiers would beat him. Whatever he said was considered a lie because his answers were quite insane. How can a guy from a separate part of the world end up in front of an army base in the middle of Pakistan? Something was wrong. He had NO money and NO ID. He could not speak Urdu or any other language spoken in Pakistan (except for Persian and very basic Pushto) and he was here. The part that disturbed ME the most was when he was being beaten. His cries and his screams were killing me. But I knew it was necessary. He was avoiding many of my questions but after some strong beating he started giving me good, but still vague, answers.
Beating was a necessity in such a situation. Being a person who fails to express his emotions many times, I could not control my emotions and decided to make up answers of my own to help this alien get out of misery. But, I could not do that. It was a matter of security and I must realize my responsibility of working for the greater good. I just did what the officers told me to. At such a point in life, one must remain as objective as possible while caging those soft emotions for the moment.
Then later, as I pondered over the whole situation, it did depress me. If you look at it this way, the guy was from a remote area of the world with nothing even close to the words "technology" or "modern -life." These people can be easily fooled or easily impressed by something as simple as a Pen. They only live on whatever the earth offers in their area. They eat simple and dress simple. They sometimes have never even seen a television set or a car. Read books by Greg Mortensen to get an idea how it is like in such parts of the world. They are physically strong because they eat pure food and do manual labor. After keeping all this in mind, put yourself in his shoes. Imagine being in a land with uniformed guards with guns and not being able to understand them. Then imagine being beaten up. You have no money and no documents. You don't even have relatives and you think that these people with guns may kill you.
The end result was that the guy was found to be a victim of fraud. Someone had promised him job and money in Pakistan and smuggled him here through mountains. He was fooled and his money was taken. Humans are pathetic. Worse than animals. The reason why he was not telling me the truth was that he feared we may kill him as he had broken many laws to come to Pakistan. Of course we would never kill someone just like that. I had to assure him he would not be shot dead and must cooperate to ensure his safe return to his own country. He did cooperate at last and was sent back after verification.
We are so insignificant. And there are so many inhuman acts happening all around the world. Dear friends, please step out of your air-conditioned lives and see the atrocities of the world. Learn from it. Condemn it. Wake up and fight those who may call themselves humans but are worse than animals. And friends, realize the fact that we are very insignificant but our actions may have a huge impact on this world. You are insignificant but you are powerful. Rise up.
Peace.
Friday, September 16, 2011
I Am Grateful For... a new blog
Dear Friends and Followers,
I have started a new life project to list down all the things I am Grateful for. I will write one thing every day (at least try to). I would appreciate it if you follow it and tell your friends to follow it too.
The webpage is:
www.shehrozandgratitude.blogspot.com
You can also click on the title and it will take you there :-)
Thank you and love you all :-)
I have started a new life project to list down all the things I am Grateful for. I will write one thing every day (at least try to). I would appreciate it if you follow it and tell your friends to follow it too.
The webpage is:
www.shehrozandgratitude.blogspot.com
You can also click on the title and it will take you there :-)
Thank you and love you all :-)
Grandmother :-D
Grandmothers are the cutest creatures on Earth. Their love and affection is matchless but their cranky mood can destroy mountains and dry out rivers!
I love my grandmother and I believe so does everyone else. I was just a couple weeks old when my grandparents "adopted" me from my parents. There were a gazillion people who criticized my parents for letting this happen. But they made me what I am today. My grandmother spoiled me to the core. I love her.
Grandmothers Zindabad!!!
Friday, September 9, 2011
Fallen
(I am posting after a long gap because I don't know. Do not mind the gloomy tone of this post)
I have kept my emotions locked inside my chest since so many days (30 days to be more precise). I have to keep them caged in the abyss of my chaotic self. I must do this. For my family. And for my self. These emotions are corroding me from inside. Slowly eating me like termites consuming soft, moist wood. Unbearably Painful. If I let them out, it will spread through this Earth like a plague. They will ride to every corner of the world on black smoke and doom every living creature to eternal torture. Whatever I write will not make sense to you because it is not even making sense to me. My hands are writing but I do not know how to express Or WHAT to express. Malady. Yes. Total insanity. Undoubtedly.
All was almost perfect. Things were going smooth on the front- seat of the roller coaster of my life. Posters here. Articles there. Advises here. Suggestions there. Anxiety here. Dreams there. My life was very bling-bling. Everything was sparkly and shiny. And then THAT hit me. Hit me with full fury like a cavalry smashing with the shields of enemy soldiers. BAM. That is when I lost it. It is the DARK AGE in the history of my memories.
And when the dreams fall crashing on you like shards of glass from a billion broken windows. That is when you realize that there are so many questions without any answers. You come so close to it and then everything just breaks into pieces. It's like when you hold a beautiful rose, you love it for a couple of days. But when you hold it a few days later, it simply disintegrates right in your hand. It's beauty lost. It's magic gone. The sky weeps. The wind wails. The earth moans. Is there a way out? And escape from this flesh and an exit from this world? Freedom forever?
I do not know what the future holds for me. I do not know if I will ever be able to rise again and mount on my horse of life to fight again. Do I have enough strength? I do not know.
I have kept my emotions locked inside my chest since so many days (30 days to be more precise). I have to keep them caged in the abyss of my chaotic self. I must do this. For my family. And for my self. These emotions are corroding me from inside. Slowly eating me like termites consuming soft, moist wood. Unbearably Painful. If I let them out, it will spread through this Earth like a plague. They will ride to every corner of the world on black smoke and doom every living creature to eternal torture. Whatever I write will not make sense to you because it is not even making sense to me. My hands are writing but I do not know how to express Or WHAT to express. Malady. Yes. Total insanity. Undoubtedly.
All was almost perfect. Things were going smooth on the front- seat of the roller coaster of my life. Posters here. Articles there. Advises here. Suggestions there. Anxiety here. Dreams there. My life was very bling-bling. Everything was sparkly and shiny. And then THAT hit me. Hit me with full fury like a cavalry smashing with the shields of enemy soldiers. BAM. That is when I lost it. It is the DARK AGE in the history of my memories.
And when the dreams fall crashing on you like shards of glass from a billion broken windows. That is when you realize that there are so many questions without any answers. You come so close to it and then everything just breaks into pieces. It's like when you hold a beautiful rose, you love it for a couple of days. But when you hold it a few days later, it simply disintegrates right in your hand. It's beauty lost. It's magic gone. The sky weeps. The wind wails. The earth moans. Is there a way out? And escape from this flesh and an exit from this world? Freedom forever?
I do not know what the future holds for me. I do not know if I will ever be able to rise again and mount on my horse of life to fight again. Do I have enough strength? I do not know.
Thursday, June 16, 2011
People Judge People
A few minutes ago, something happened that has added to my already heavy conscience. I saw a bunch of people in authority gang up on a single person for something he did a day ago and I never spoke a word. What he did was wrong! AGREED.
But…
It is funny how a bunch of over-hyper attention seekers can successfully market their own opinion. It is funnier how even wise people fall for this trap and believe on rumors with no objective evidence. HOW UNJUST!The funniest part is that these people in authority think that they know everything but in fact they are just a toy to be played around with.
I am not taking sides because I never do, all I ask from this world is this: STOP BEING JUDGEMENTAL FOR GOD’S SAKE! You cannot imagine how many hearts you have broken just because you misunderstood the whole scenario thanks to your ignorance. I never judge till I have equally heard both sides of the story, but people in this world do not do that! What a beautiful world we live in. Thank you very much. Please, get lost!
Friday, June 10, 2011
The House of Lost Glory
(The following refers to my house. But it also refers to my ancestors and family.)
This is the story of a house. A house that once stood strong and proud. A house that had power and resources. But now, this house has lost its glory. It has lost its influence and power. It has lost its strength. This house now stands divided with hundreds of holes in its body.
This was MY house. A few days ago, a bomb blast across the road severely damaged it. Cracked walls, shattered glass, blown away doors, broken windows, damaged frames, dust, smoke, dread and what not!
It is extremely depressing to enter your house without a door. More depressing to see everything lying broken on the floor. Much more depressing to realize that this house stood strong for the last 30 years.
The builders are too old now, the new generation is too young and busy. Who will rebuild the house? Who will restore it to its lost glory? The name must carry on. The glory must be revived. The lineage must continue! The family must rise again!
Monday, June 6, 2011
Little Beautiful Things
Oh that swift morning breeze,
The sound of those rustling leaves.
Beauty is everywhere;
Open your eyes and it will become all clear.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Those Little Miracles
Who is God? Where is God?
I once got slightly confused when I tried to answer these questions. I would ponder for hours trying to make sense out of everything but then I gave up because I realized that I was going insane. One night I was so disturbed that I cried and asked the sky above me, “If you are really up there Oh God, then prove it to me! Show me a sign! Tell me that you Exist! Help me! Guide me! Answer my questions! I AM GOING MAD!”
I never got a reply from God in the form of a huge paranormal miracle or a hard copy of a letter from the sky or even an Email. I was just being too dumb and too naive. Soon, I started seeing these small miracles around me. I started seeing these little signs here and there that slowly answered all my questions. I was seeing things I had never seen before. I was seeing those Little Miracles all around me. And that was the instance I realized that God is really up there.
Miracles are everywhere. You just need to have an eye for them. I started having these dreams in which I would be warned of upcoming dangers and would be given a solution for it. Everything was in codes and secret messages and I just had to focus to unlock them. I did. And then I started seeing miracles not only in my dreams but in my real life too. Starting with that laughter of a baby who was being bounced up and down by his father. That innocent laughter. Dripping with magic so strong that even the worst of moods could be set right with that charming laughter of that pure baby. Miraculous. Nature’s medicine to cure depression.
Then, I looked outside my window and saw a bird making a nest in a tree. It was a miracle how a small bird could make a home for itself all alone using nothing but small twigs and grass.
Then I saw how a laborer was lifting heavy weights with super-human strength. He had to feed his family and the miracle was in his determination to do that!
I further saw many small and unnoticed miracles all around which strengthened my belief in God.
A Toast of Whiskey
In 2008, I met a girl named Mehwish Zuberi from Islamabad. I barely talked to her and she hated me for no apparent reason. NO APPARENT REASON!!! So that pretty much tells you how weird this girl is.
Little did we know that someday we will become BESTFRIENDS or ChuddyBuddies as we like to call ourselves. We became the Alcohol Duo: Whiskey and Vodka. And we became the Pant-Stealers! And the Dentonic pair! And the tekeela-shakeela! And the Waheed Murad Couple. If you don’t know us then you will not understand much about us. I don’t care if you don’t understand whatever I am sharing in this post because this post is actually dedicated to my partner in crime, Mehwish Zuberi. She knows all my secrets and I know she will wake up in the middle of the night to help me in any trouble. She is my personal advisor and counselor. She is my conscience. Whenever I am indulged in depressing thoughts or dying with confusion, she has always pulled me out of that! YOU ARE AWESOME! We both make a deadly combination! I will always be there for you…
Now, she is on her way to the Land of the Cool people: LUMS. I don’t have much of a problem with that except that we will be separated! The Twins will go their separate ways and who knows when they will meet again! She will become part of the cool crowd while I will remain a not-so-nerdy-looking nerd.
Haye, the vodka and whiskey will be distilled into two separate bottles and shipped to two different drunkards. The thought of it is depressing. But, God bless Mark Zuckerberg for Facebook!!! We shall never part in cyber-space.
Mehwhiskey, do not forget your end of the deal regarding LUMS! Otherwise, I shall steal back the lucky pants from you!
PS: We may behave like brother and sister, but WE ARE NOT. We are not related at all. She shall never be my sister.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Rainy Peshawar
(Just another of those random 2-minute creations.)
It all starts with a “tip tip tip” like a baby tip-toeing on cold marble floor.
Then it increases to a “sharr sharr sharr” like a coin jar toppled over.
A whiff of wet soil rises up in the air.
The aroma of wet leaves spread everywhere.
The cloud grunts and rumbles.
The mountain and valley grumbles.
The kids jump under the falling stars,
Forgetting all the sorrows and closing open scars.
This is how it rains in my city so divine.
Washes all the dirt and removes all the swine.
Purifies the streets of all the disease and blood,
Its wrath can turn into an unforgiving, revengeful flood.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
A Driver’s Life
A person can learn a lot just from driving on a busy road on a hot sunny day. Driving can give some really valuable lessons on living one’s life…efficiently and to the best!
Just like in life, on the road the driver must remain cautious and alert at all times. He must look around and anticipate every move of the other car drivers around him. He must look through the window of the car in front of him to estimate and calculate the movement of the car in front of that! He must listen to every noise and distinguish the useful from the useless. While driving at a high speed, he must watch out for any pedestrian and carefully notice every muscle of that pedestrian’s body to predict his/her next move. Yes, a driver must be in his highest state of alert mind.
With all this stress on the brain and body, a driver must also enjoy the music that is playing on the radio. He must entertain himself with whatever is around him and enjoy his drive. This driver must appreciate the beauty that lines the road; admire the scenery; gasp at the might of the mountains; smile at the majesty of the flowing river. A driver must also realize that the person sitting on his passenger seat is also on the same journey as him and feels the same. He should also realize that he must take care of and respect every human being on the road as they are also on their own journeys of life!
Sometimes, the car air-conditioning stops working and it gets hot. It can specially get unbearable when the car comes to a halt at a red-light. The driver must remain patient and keep his head cool no matter what happens. This driver may also face hindrances in his journey in the form of a traffic jam or a punctured tire but he must keep his head and think rationally at all time. He must hold on to his sanity and perseverance. He must remain steadfast.The driver must not give up.
Sometimes, the journey may get too long and tiresome with constant hurdles, but the driver must not stop. He must drive on. The destination may be just one turn away. He must push himself just a little longer and reach his destination. He MUST drive on. No matter what. He. Must. Drive. On…
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Baba Again…
Delirium.
And no, you are not to live life on the safe side. No, the goal is not to get out of this life unhurt and with a beautiful, pristine heart.
When you go to God, all that you have for Him to see is a heart tarnished and ripped, bleeding because it has lived to the extreme, aching because it has lived to the extreme; exuberant, winged, proud at its fallen state, sheepish perhaps but never, ever ashamed. So that when He sees your heart, he can see not the traces, but the live scars of a life well-lived.
Be hungry. Know that your heart and soul are not the porcelain dolls in your living room. They are the battle, and they are the warriors, and they are the haul. They are to be the casualty, over and over again.
Source: http://saagandparanoia.blogspot.com/2011/01/delirium.html
Now, when I read this, my deep respect for my father increased ten-folds. He is one person I know who has lived his life clean but full of hardships. When he goes to God, he will have a “a heart tarnished and ripped, bleeding because it has lived to the extreme.” When he goes to God, God will see not the traces, but the live scars of a life well-lived. I am not exaggerating but telling the evident truth. I admire him not as a FATHER but as a HUMAN BEING. He fought to bring a change for his people. He failed. He fought again and failed again. And again. And again. Then he struggled to provide us with the best of everything. Struggled. Still struggling. He tried so much so that he did not worry about his life and jumped into the deadly world of politics for his people and for his family. Whoever I meet, all I hear is that DR RIAZ HAS A CLEAN HEART BUT A CARELESS TONGUE. Yes, he has a Careless Tongue which makes him all the more special. He speaks his mind out and is never hypocritical. An innocent man by nature. He is one person who deserves to be confronted with God with tarnished and ripped heart but not ashamed. NOT ASHAMED.
I wish I could stand by him in the same condition. I wish I could be attacked and almost killed for helping my people. Twice. I wish I could get nervous break-downs with the thought of my family’s future. I wish I could stand by him neck to neck in front of God and say: I DID WHAT I COULD!
I wish. I wish I could be like him. But I know that I will never be able to reach his shoulders. I know that I will never have a heart as strong as his. I know that I will never have the strength he has. I know that I will never match his determination. And I lastly, I know I will never come even closer to the Love he has for his people and family. For me, he is a Living Legend.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
That Hot Shower…
There is something about that hot water stream splashing on your head that gets you all thinking; thoughts about life and death, love and hate, past, present and future flow into your veins as if they are a part of your rushing blood. Thoughts become Blood. It is funny how hot shower is the source of many of my essays and speeches and realizations. A billion questions spring up in the shower.
Today, in the shower I reflected upon my past and present. I reflected upon all that had happened to me in my more than 18 years of life. And at everything that happened to me I would ask these questions: Why Me? What if?
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